The Childhood Hook
As all young boys do, we found ourselves with a slot car track at home. The common small Ninco or Carrera tracks, magnetised to the moon but enough speed to send cars flying into the dog bowl. Whether it was a well-worn Carrera or a Ninco set missing half its guardrails, it was magic
The Bloemfontein Chapter
Many years later, after moving to Bloemfontein, I found myself among an amazing group of people. Every Thursday night, we used to go slot car racing but this track was not your average toy shop special. It was a handcrafted wooden masterpiece, complete with custom scenery and just enough chaos to keep us on our toes.We could even adjust the voltage to what felt, at the time, like 3-phase power.
“Cape Town” – Sigh.
Unfortunately, after moving to Cape Town, I just couldn’t find that same group of people to fit in with. It never felt like home. I was back to plastic tracks and anoraks weighing magnets like pit engineers. That’s not what I enjoy. The beauty behind slot car racing is about enjoying your inner childhood again with a load of smack talk and nonsense to forget the week’s troubles. Just worrying about that tenth of a second.
Fast Forward: 10 Years Later
Fast forward ten years, and the stars align. Timing works out, and I finally wield a slot car controller again.
We arrive at Shamrock Raceway, where Gavin has recreated the look of the very first location the 1953 track, as we called it, at Jack Sprat’s house. I see the names on the timing equipment:
Mad Butcher (real name Cobus)
Captain Slow (real name Gavin)
Prof (real name Nicolaas)
Brutus (real name Bertus)
And, of course, many new faces I haven’t raced with yet. It all felt like it could just bring tears to my eyes.
Race 1: Original Abarths – Minute to Win It
Consistency is King
Simple cars. One minute. Car stays on the track. That’s it. Sounds easy, right?
Wrong
These little cars were always brilliant just fast enough to get you warmed up. But lose focus and you’ll be tumbling over the bridge or coming down the main straight and missing your braking point. It’s always close racing and consistency is key when you’re doing about a 6-second lap and only have a minute to win. One mistake, and you’re the one shouting “MARSHALLLLLLL!” across the room, costing you that one lap you needed to win.
Of course, my consistency was appalling. But having set the fastest lap during race pace, I thought: “Hmmm…”, as the legendary Ou Ball (real name Richard) used to chirp when he looked smug after an accomplishment.
Race 2: Beetle Käfer Group 5 – 2 Minutes of Mayhem
Momentum is Everything
Again, car stays on track.
Completely different handling style—our speed has doubled, but the grip still isn’t there. And as Prof puts it, “the arse on the Beetle is as loose as Tastic rice.”
You’re pushing for that balance between a little slip and not losing momentum. Beetles love momentum. They don’t have the best brakes or amazing grip—but my god, are they fun to drive.
The chirps are flying. We’re laughing at the arse-sliding Beetles, and it’s pure joy. Nothing in the world beats being right here.
Race 3: Slot it Group C – 3 Minutes + Fuel Stop (Own Car)
The Big Guns Are Out
Now things are heating up.
These are the big guns. We went from 6-second laps to cars doing 4s—or lower. Some of the Slot.its have had love poured into them. Still stock, but you wouldn’t believe what loosening the body on the chassis, adding shims on the axles, or gluing tyres can do. It’s all about real suspension roll and weight transfer worthy of an actual LMP car.
Now there’s strategy:
You start nearly empty.
Fuel carries over to the next race.
Do you fill up now or use every drop for each heat?
Unfortunately, I was in no man’s land. Pitstops worse than Ferrari in F1. It took me three attempts just to stop exactly on the fuel mark.
But oh boy—how fun are these? The speed is blistering. The grip is insane. And “Smoooooth Operatoooorrrr” is playing in my head as I try to be as smooth as possible.
Race 4: Mitsubishi Pajero Dakars – The “Itchypussies” Minute
Controlled Chaos
We are back to cars stay on track and it’s a equal playing field.
Another minute-to-win-it. This time with the itchypussies (officially known as Mitsubishi Pajero Dakars) with knobbly tyres and the balance of a drunken giraffe.
These are all about riding the ragged edge. The knobbly tyres give zero grip. We’re back to Tastic rice, only now we’re rolling over and flipping spectacularly. These allow you to play dirty… not that I would of course cough… Let’s just say, if someone tries to overtake, the arse becomes a weapon.
I was locked in. Full focus. My goal? 10 laps per lane.
That means you need to average 6 seconds a lap.
Let’s go:
Lane 1: Got it. 10 laps.
Lane 2: Rolled twice at the bridge. Dammit MARSHALLLLL I had to push hard at least blue lane is on fire, and just about made it over the line and got my 10 laps
Lane 3: Car had wheel hop but YES. 10 laps. Win in the bag for Toy Boy (the name given to me years ago).
The Real Win
I did it. I came back and won one of the races. But honestly, that was nothing, nothing compared to the camaraderie, the mountains of fun, and the nonsense we talked about.
We reminisced about:
Ou Ball’s tricks, like the shooter drink method the kamikaze pilot shot
The tin cups we each had with our own personalised Agip, Castrol, shell etc branding on the farm for “jakkals pis” (sweet wine)
The wild idea to turn the track power up to 3-phase voltage madness with 21,000 RPM motors
Thursday night slot car racing with the right crew isn’t just fun it’s therapy with controllers.This was truly the best Thursday night I’ve had in years around a slotcar track. I left with the biggest smile, dreaming about one day building a proper wooden track in Cape Town.
The One Rule
If that dream becomes real, there will be only one rule:
“Don’t take it seriously. We have fun.”
For now, Toy Boy’s controller will be hung up. But he’ll be back—and hopefully soon. Because slot car racing, with the right crowd of mates, is some of the most fun you’ll ever have with your clothes on.